Masonic Tombstones in Ballard County Kentucky

Over the years as I've tromped around cemeteries for geneaology information, I've noticed tombstones with the Mason symbol. Masons seem steeped in mystery and I don't know what they're all about.

But, I'm fascinated that people felt such an affinity with them that they added the Masonic symbol to their tombstones. Sometimes it is given as much importance as the pertinent data about the deceased.



J. Alvis Grace, 1887-1920, gives over most of the informative space on his tombstone to the Masonic symbol. These photos were taken in the Mt. Pleasant Baptist Church Cemetery outside of LaCenter, Kentucky.



Not far away is this stone for George S. Myers, 1847-1918. I was taken by the decoration on the front of this stone. There is no other information on it than what can be seen in this photo and it's like a little box.



George W. Terry, Dec. 20, 1870-May 16, 1926 has the Mason's symbol uppermost on his tombstone.



John Robert Williams, Aug. 7, 1888 to Sept. 19, 1955 makes use of the Mason symbol where others might have used a dash.



W.C. Mitchell Feb. 8, 1878 to Feb. 3, 1941, does the same thing, but with a deeply engraved design for the Masonic symbol.



Robert Hahs, and wife Nancy, are listed on the side opposite the one given to nothing but the family name and the Mason symbol.



There's no indication of Nancy's affiliation.



The stone of William Reesor and his wife Maggie Reesor has the Masonic symbol above his name and a star above hers. I'm assuming the star is for the Order of the Eastern Star, which could be joined by either men or women. The men had to be masons and the women associated with a mason.

I also spotted this stone and wondered if the star on it referenced the Order of the Eastern Star.



One of the really interesting stones I saw on this little trip through the cemetery was this one for Dr. James W. Wallace. The stone is a Woodmen of the World one, which I understand from the wiki was a benefit of membership with Woodmen of the World until the 1920s when it was determined this was too expensive.



Wallace, born Oct. 4, 1859, died Aug. 29, 1915, has yet another monument. You can see the corner of it in this photo. It's a slab behind this headstone.



Of course, this is where the Mason symbol is.



I can only guess he felt enough affinity for the Masons that he wanted to add that to the Woodmen of the World tombstone.

It's curious, isn't it, what we feel such affection for that we want preserved on our tombstones. For many of us, a tombstone is our little bit of immortality. I would guess the most common designation on them is "mother" or "father," but for some an association with a group - a club, if you will - is so strong that they want to be forever identified as a member.

Is there any group you would feel such a strong affinity with? I can't think of anything that would rise to that level for me. I noticed none of these were recent. I'm not sure if that's happenstance, or if fewer people do this anymore. Obviously, the Masons must serve a real purpose in people's lives - or at least did at this time.

Depends on How You Look At It

New Years is a time when we look for a new start. Of course, we could get that new start on any arbitrary day we chose, but we have decided January 1 is it. I haven't been too keen on falling into the trap of making New Year's Resolutions for quite some time. It's a recipe for failure for me, so I stopped doing it many years ago.

I do, however, chose something each year to focus on. I haven't yet done that this year - partially because I haven't spent enough time with pen and paper to figure out where I should put my energies. It is never something like losing weight - while a noble goal, obviously not one I'm likely to carry out. It's usually something more esoteric than that.

I do know that at this time next year I want my life to look different - be better, more calm. The trick is how to achieve that.

I also know I need to have opportunities this year to give into my whims, to meet new people, to see different things. I have become far too staid in my daily life - partially because daily life has required more and more of me in the last few months. I have to figure out how to make daily life work for me instead of me working for it.

This evening I went to the funeral home. Mattie's mother died after a long bout with alzheimer's. Regardless of their condition, we are never ready to let go of our loved ones. I haven't seen Mrs. Scott in many years. Those years can slip away so quickly, although I'm sure they've seemed very long and arduous for her family.  Although my presence was not a comfort to anyone there I'm sure, it was good to be there to honor the grief a family is experiencing at a time like this.

It's a rocky way to begin a New Year. Or, it's a new beginning for Mrs. Scott. All of life - and death - depends on how you look at it.

Next week my brother, Jackie, will go to the hospital for surgery to remove a lung cancer. The prognosis is excellent for him. I wish I could stay and be here to help when he has surgery, but I must return to my job. That's the difficulty of having a life going in more than one location - it's hard to do justice to all of them. I know it's hard to understand for those who are living life in one locale - the way we were meant to.

It's by the grace of God that the lung cancer was caught so early. His last year has been a series of miracle blessings disguised as traumas. Again, all about how you look at it I suppose.

Maybe that is something I need to mull over as 2009 gets underway.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year!

I hope 2009 is a year of great joy for each of us. May it be the time we see as the watershed year when life became exactly what we've always wanted it to be. May we all have joy, laughter, love, kindness, freedom and peace.

Seeking Zathah

I spent some time today in the Wickliffe, Kentucky cemetery. I have some family buried there and went to check on the graves. After I had done that I decided I would wander around a bit and look for some names that might make good characters in a book. I started snapping photos of tombstones as reminders. I also took some photos of tombstones that were interesting for one reason or another.

As I was driving out of the cemetery I spotted another unusual tombstone and just snapped a photo from the car. Then, a few feet away, I saw the stone below. I took a photo because it was a name I had never seen before. Zathah Lee Glenn. Zathah.



So, tonight I google for Zathah. And I find a geneaology page at http://www.rootsweb.ancestry.com/~modade/martin.htm that says:

Dalmus Clarence Martin was born on 2 Jul 1909 in Prague, Lincoln Co. OK.  He died on 19 Jan 2004 in Salina, Saline Co. KS.  Dalmus married Zathah Glenn Overstreet, daughter of Mac D. Overstreet and Mary Jane Lipe, on 15 Oct 1939 in Hutchinson, Reno Co. KS.  Zathah was born on 14 Jun 1914 in Murphysboro, Jackson Co. IL.  She died on 6 Aug 1990.

From “Kansas Obituaries,” http://homepages.rootsweb.com/
~overstrt/obits/ksobits.html:  Dalmus C. Martin, 94, Salina,(Kansas) died Monday, Jan. 19. (2004) He was born July 2, 1909, in Prague, Okla. He was a chef and restaurant owner for 58 years, retiring in 1985. He and his wife managed the Wareham Coffee shop for many years. He was preceded in death by his wife, Zathah Glenn Overstreet-Martin in August, 1990. . . .”

Okay... am I the only one who thinks it is very weird that I find an odd name in a cemetery in the county I'm from in Kentucky, google for it and the first thing I look at on the web is about a person who got married in the town where I now live, some states away? How many towns are there in the US? And they happen to have a connection to the one town where I live?

There's also a myspace page of someone with that name and they live in Wichita, less than an hour from Hutchinson, where I live. The other reference to the name online is in a cell phone forum. About the phone I carry.

I'm sure there's some mysterious, deep meaning I am supposed to divine from this, but at the moment I'm just struck by the oddness of it all.

Literary Agent Hunt

I've been doing some hunting around for a literary agent. In the process I've discovered a number of agents who blog. These are sometimes quite interesting, if disheartening, to read. The numbers are not in favor of those of us who want to find an agent with whom we can build a career.

The general thrust of the blogs I've seen so far is, "I'm overworked. I'm taking on one out of every 43,012 people who approach me. I'm annoyed by your mere existence."

I can only assume that the perfect match for me is out there and that I will find them.

What do you say after 28 years?

Tonight I had dinner with a friend I haven't seen in probably 28 years, maybe more. I suppose you can rightfully question the word "friend" after this lengthy silence, but I'm not sure what other term to use.

Cathy and I were friends in high school. She was a year ahead of me and after she graduated we drifted apart a bit, and then I went away to school, and you know the story. It has been repeated millions of times and our version is no different. Except that she found me on facebook and we reconnected. Or at least we had dinner.

So, what do you say to someone over barbecued chicken breast and salmon when you haven't talked in 28 years? How exactly do you catch up? Where do you even start that process?

I was thinking on the drive there what I would ask someone that would give me insight into who they are. I ponder this occasionally and, as of yet, I've been unable to come up with the questions that are appropriate to ask in such a circumstance. What I want to know is, "who are you? what do you think about? what do you dream of? where do you want to go? what has touched you? what defines your life? how would you describe yourself without mentioning another person or a profession? how do you move in the world?" I just haven't figured out how to ask people those things. Any one of those questions tends to cause a physical recoiling. I want to know the answers to all of those plus about four dozen more. I have learned through experience that this is overwhelming to people.

I will say the conversation tonight flowed easily, and none of it was rehashing our high school glory days. (Not that I had any glory days then but it seems that "glory" is always supposed to precede "days" in such cases.) I know I've covered my dislike of that rehashing here, so I won't belabor the point.

A lot happens in a life in nearly three decades. It's more than a generation, after all.

It's not my place to tell her story, so I won't, but suffice it to say that tragedy has touched her family's life. The honesty of sharing that is astounding. Tragedy shapes who we are and to enter into a relationship with another person we have to be honest about the forces that act on us. How we react to tragedy speaks volumes about the people we are. Before she told me of this, she told me her family was happy. That is what all of us are seeking, in one way or another. I'm so glad they have found it.

When I was driving home I realized that I shared very little of myself - at least the "self" that I think is the important one. That wasn't intentional on my part, it just happened that way. Maybe the music was too loud or the temperature was too cold or my mind was too occupied with the oddness of seeing someone I hadn't seen in so long. The more obvious answer is that I was reminding myself to not launch into a recitation of the above questions.

We did cover some meaningful topics. The experience caused me to consider how we really do engage with people in different environments. Or at least how I do.

Relationship is more about how we conduct ourselves than about how we say we do. Maybe that's why it's hard to maintain relationships with people when we're not with them on a regular basis. When you interact daily with people it requires a level of honesty unlike anything else, and it's an honesty we have no choice about. What we say is not as meaningful because we're living our lives in front of them. It's impossible to hide our embarrassment, longing and foolishness from those who are witness to it. But, we can build in a buffer zone. Twenty-eight years is a serious buffer zone.

But, Cathy and I both had the courage to come forward and step across it. And it has certainly given me something to think about. The experts say we all like to talk about ourselves, but if that's true, then why do we find it difficult to talk about who we really are most of the time?

And in this sort of situation, it's hard to figure out what you want to say about yourself that is telling that they don't already know. What are the defining moments that brought you from the eighteen year old they knew to who you are today? And, is the first meeting in nearly three decades the right time to subject someone to a litany of them? The answer is "no," I believe, so tonight we covered some of the really big ones and left the lesser known, but very powerful ones, for another time.

Friendship is a dance of timing and revelation. Even reconnecting to old friends. And honesty is a big part of it all. Maybe that's why blogs where people talk honestly about their lives - warts and all - are always more interesting than those where people just recite their children's latest accomplishments. Don't we all want to think others are as uncertain as we are? Does that make us horrible people? Or is it just a bit of 'round about honesty that we feel uncertain?

Something I really appreciated about this encounter was that Cathy went to some effort to make it happen. She called and wrote. I called and wrote. And eventually we made it happen. That seems a good beginning to a reconnection. It was great to see her.

Christmas

We started Christmas morning off at Bobby and Cathy's house to see what Santa brought BC. He must have been a very good boy this year because Santa brought him a laptop and a wireless setup to go with it.

By 8:30 a.m. I was flat on the floor in their office, my head stuck under the desk, to see what we needed to do to get the wireless going. What can I say? I'm a bit of a geek. I get excited by new technology toys.

By the way, please take note of BC's new jammies. Had you heard his mom and grandma the night before, you would have thought he was 5 instead of approaching 19.

BC was so good this year that Santa also got him a wii. Christmas afternoon was spent with guitar hero...



But, illustrating one of the many ways he's so good that Santa was so nice... he shared.



There were other games too... bowling and golf and more...



Look at that form!



Somewhere along the way we opened presents...



Can you guess what it is?



Everyone likes stockings!



Today Mattie's family had their Christmas so I went out to see everyone. It's always fun to see kids enjoy Christmas.

I wanted to play with Alex's dinosaur, but it seemed rude to ask a child to share his toy.



Hannah was making a haul, too.



Johnny and Leah had three envelopes for their nieces. He said one had a lot of money, one a medium amount, and one a small amount. He didn't know which was which and let them choose. They all seemed happy at the end.






I discovered Leah is one of my own kind when it comes to wrapping presents. As she put it, "I like to make them pretty." She was modeling the ribbon from my packages.

Generally I don't exchange gifts with all of them, because we're not usually together, but I had picked up some little ornaments for each of them as a remembrance. I had expected to leave them with Mattie because I didn't expect to see everyone, but it was very nice to share that fun with them.

It was a nice day, although I wasn't my usual perky self quite yet. I am, however, feeling better. Tomorrow I'm eating real food again! It's a big day!

Round Two

I got sick overnight so couldn't go shopping this morning. I tried, but I was just too exhausted from the stomach flu, round 2. Tonight I'm feeling much better, but tired. I'm hoping the morning dawns with me feeling my usual perky self.

It has been many years since I've not gone out the day after Christmas shopping. I tried. I drove to Paducah, about 30 minutes away, and by the time I got there I was so tired I had to sit in the car for about 40 minutes before I could even go inside, where I bought nothing.

I went to another store and I bought some wrapping paper and one ornament. Not much of a haul for the day after, but it just couldn't be helped. Maybe there will be goodies left for me when I get my next chance to shop. Or maybe this is the universe's way of telling me I have too much Christmas stuff. Hmmm... nope... that can't possibly be it. However, I can only assume there was nothing there I desperately needed.

I've spent the rest of the time since I woke up trying to disinfect anything I might have touched so no one else gets sick. I hate it that I was around everyone on Christmas Day and could have given them the flu before realizing I had it. I was so hoping I would escape this, but it was not to be. Fortunately, no one else shows any symptoms yet. I hope that continues. I will feel just awful if someone else gets sick.

Hutchinson News Story about my Christmas Tree

The Hutchinson News did a story about my Christmas Tree. So fun!

Check it out at: http://www.hutchnews.com/Todaystop/treesiri.

I hope your Christmas Day has been fabulous so far and the rest of your holiday season is spectacular!

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas

Thanks for sharing some of the holiday season with me this year.
It has been memorable. Below are some photos I've shared this month, along with a video tour of the house.


In the sunporch I have three lighted trees this year. The full size one is the Santa tree. When I sit in that chair I can see the main tree in the living room.



It was inspired by this ornament...





To the left of the santa tree in the sunporch is the red and white tree...





This Santa is on the writing desk beside the red tree.



On the other side of the sunporch, in front of the piano, is the pink and green tree.







Under the living room tree, the main tree is where I have all the presents.



There's a theme every year. This year's blue, purple, silver and white was inspired by a ribbon.



The tree looks different exposed for the lights.

Also in the living room I have the copper and gold tree.

In the dining room this year I have a white tree with blue, silver and crystal ornaments.




Beside this tree, on a chest, I have some of my Santas.

I also have this tree in the dining room...

And near it two of my favorite Santas...

This is right behind the table, where I spread out the goodies when I had my open house Saturday night. I love to bake, so I cooked up a number of sweets.


If you want to see it all in context, I took some video. Just click on the arrow and it will play automatically for you.


Greg took some photos of folks Saturday night. Some included Ace Jackalope.









Thanks for being part of my holiday season this year. Merry Christmas to you and yours. If you're enjoying a big family celebration, or gathering with friends, or appreciating the beauty of solitude this Christmas, may it be all you wish it to be and full of wonder. Happy Christmas to All.


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Check www.patsyterrell.com for the blog, art, and more. My southern fiction book is complete and I'm looking for a literary agent. Friend me on Facebook.com, Follow me at Twitter.com.